Shine

There's something slow about the way sunlight moves on winter days.. like a slow pair of feet up the stairs, a lull in the wind that lazily contacts everything. I watched a movie today and ate. And looked at the insect on our glass door and the sunlight outside. Sometimes time goes into slow mode and everything seems to move slowly. And yet after staring at its six moving legs silhouetted against the clear glass, when you look up, you see the bigger hand on the clock has moved from 2 to 3. A whole minute gone.
Just like that.

I wish I had learnt to play the violin, carve things into shape, sing, dance, learnt something. Or had some innate sense of self like the river that flows and gushes through land according to some watery proprioception.
I have this ticking clock inside me, and a voice that talks to me all the time of jobs waiting to be done, experiences waiting to be had, people waiting to be met and love, waiting to be felt.
It leaves me breathless with its beauty. and all i can do, and want to do is curl up against the soft sun and watch time furl and unfurl till it's time for me to wake up, unravel myself from my cocoon and.. shine.

picture from www.deviantart.com

:winter sun: by utopic-man